Sadness and Deliberateness

Sad Man

I was talking with a friend yesterday about sadness. Each of us feels this emotion from time to time and for the most part accept that we will simply be swept along with its feelings.  Emotions are automatic reactions. When I am feeling the emotion, there are a number of associated physical reactions and thoughts that comprise my overall sense of sadness.

Sadness, quite simply, is our inner desire for something to be different than it is. I am sad because my relationship with a friend is ended. I am sad because I lost my job. I am sad because I lost a prized possession. In sadness, I am lamenting that something I want is no longer in my life.

Deliberateness asks us to accept what is. In the case of the lost job, it is not going to come back because I am sad. During my time of sadness, I am living in the past and wanting this memory to magically recreate that lost experience RIGHT NOW. The sooner I focus on what is so in my life, the sooner I move to deliberateness.

I am not suggesting that we don’t have feelings. That simply isn’t who we are as humans. What I offer is or us to consider  the option to feel sadness (or any other emotion for that matter) and rather than fall into our old patterns of reaction and behavior choose, right now, in a deliberate way, how to respond to what’s right in front of us.


Author: Thomas White

Over the past thirty-five years, Thomas White has created and led private and public organizations that initiated breakthroughs in areas as diverse as computer software, publishing, printing, market research, leadership development and organizational change. The common ingredients in his success are simple. He looked beyond the limitations that others believed and found real solutions to needs that business leaders have. He attracted the best talent to translate these innovative solutions into practical products and services that were of high value to customers. He created cultures where people love what they do, work at their best and produce extraordinary results. In addition to his role as a business leader, Thomas has been a pioneer and inventor of technologies in the computer-networking field. He is a patent holder for innovations in business process and workflow technology. As part of his passion for educating others about the interface of human and computer systems, he was the co-author of “New Tools for New Times, The Workflow Paradigm”. He has also written articles for numerous publications. In 2001, he turned his attention from leading companies to supporting leadership teams in creating organizations of excellence. After many years of being a part of the machine of change, Thomas recognized that business is the most powerful force in the world. It has a major impact on public policy and governments everywhere. It is a key influence on how we use our resources and sets an example of the values that shape communities from local to global. He formed the consulting firm of Profoundly Simple to be a guide for exemplary leaders - leaders who wisely uses the power they are entrusted with to serve their constituencies first and themselves second; leaders who know that it is good business to treat people with respect, honor the environment and act with impeccable integrity – leaders who inspire greatness in those around them and by doing so create great organizations that are notable examples of success. Feeling the itch to get back into the game again, Thomas joined with two long time friends, to start the C-Suite Network. This network of business leaders offers an online network, events, services, and insights to its 500,000 member community. In addition, the C-Suite Network produces and distributes television and radio content to an audience of over 5M per month

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