What do you do when you feel?

Anger is a feeling that makes your mouth move faster than your mind. – Evan Esar

I have been working through a situation that has taken a great deal of my attention. A friend who is also a client made repeated promises to me concerning a contract. I was assured of the terms of the contract were agreed to and the paperwork would be forthcoming. A few days ago, I was informed that the terms had dramatically changed.

little boy angerI was upset by this and in some way not surprised. I was upset for I had counted on this person’s word. I was not surprised because this person had not been reliable in the past.

The lessons for me have been pouring forth. For one thing, I wondered why I would place confidence in someone who is not reliable. I realized that I did this because I wanted something. I wanted the security that the promised contract brought me. Rather than focus only on how I could be in service, I was focused as much on the money that was going to flow my way. I find that any time that I get focused on the money first I am out of integrity. This person was showing me my own unreliability and I am grateful for that.

Another lesson is how to feel something, such as anger and not let it take over my life. It is understandable that I would feel anger. I could hear a little voice saying, “you teach people not to be attached to their feelings so you shouldn’t feel this emotion of anger.” That is not real. I did feel it. I let it rise up and engulf my whole body. What I didn’t do it allow myself to take any action from this place of anger. The anger became a teacher for me. As I was feeling this anger, I could feel times where I had betrayed this person. I could feel times when I had been out of integrity. I could feel times when I feel unsupported. I could feel my anger with myself.

man at peaceAs each layer of awareness appeared, I was able to claim these feelings and own my responsibility for my past actions. As I was doing this, freedom came over me. I no longer felt anger. In fact, what I was feeling was forgiveness of myself. The feelings I had toward the other person were calm and I can feel gratitude and peace.

What a ride.

Until later,

Thomas

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Author: Thomas White

Over the past thirty-five years, Thomas White has created and led private and public organizations that initiated breakthroughs in areas as diverse as computer software, publishing, printing, market research, leadership development and organizational change. The common ingredients in his success are simple. He looked beyond the limitations that others believed and found real solutions to needs that business leaders have. He attracted the best talent to translate these innovative solutions into practical products and services that were of high value to customers. He created cultures where people love what they do, work at their best and produce extraordinary results. In addition to his role as a business leader, Thomas has been a pioneer and inventor of technologies in the computer-networking field. He is a patent holder for innovations in business process and workflow technology. As part of his passion for educating others about the interface of human and computer systems, he was the co-author of “New Tools for New Times, The Workflow Paradigm”. He has also written articles for numerous publications. In 2001, he turned his attention from leading companies to supporting leadership teams in creating organizations of excellence. After many years of being a part of the machine of change, Thomas recognized that business is the most powerful force in the world. It has a major impact on public policy and governments everywhere. It is a key influence on how we use our resources and sets an example of the values that shape communities from local to global. He formed the consulting firm of Profoundly Simple to be a guide for exemplary leaders - leaders who wisely uses the power they are entrusted with to serve their constituencies first and themselves second; leaders who know that it is good business to treat people with respect, honor the environment and act with impeccable integrity – leaders who inspire greatness in those around them and by doing so create great organizations that are notable examples of success. Feeling the itch to get back into the game again, Thomas joined with two long time friends, to start the C-Suite Network. This network of business leaders offers an online network, events, services, and insights to its 500,000 member community. In addition, the C-Suite Network produces and distributes television and radio content to an audience of over 5M per month

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